A look around the NHL

Well its about time we looked around the league and told you folks what is up with the other teams. Im sure all of the readers from around the globe are tired of reading about the NY Rangers. Since we here at Badseedsnewsrumorsandalloutbullshit have maaaad conections around the league, we have to share what we have for you.

Today we will start with the EAST, here we go.....
In alphabetical order:

Eastern Conference

Atlanta Thrashers: These guys are gonna make a trade one day.

Boston Bruins: Although our source says nothing big is going down in Beantown, you never know, something may happen some time this season...

Buffalo Sabres: Its highly rumored on some message board that Buffalo is looking to make some trades. We havent been able to confirm just who yet.

Carolina Hurricanes: Two words.... Ron Francis. Two more words....... We think... Two more words....... he should...... Two more words....... be on.... Two more words....... the block.
Three more words... Cat, Dog, Poopy.

Florida Panthers: After Mike Keenan killed three players and being arrested for the murders, the Panthers are gonna stay pat with their 20 year olds and never EVER add any kind of veteran players to guide, and help lead this team out of the basement. That would be just wrong and stupid if they were to bring in some legit NHL talent. Stupid Mike Keenan. What a mean jerk face.

Montreal Canadiens: As noted on other sites, the Habs are INDEED going to make a trade one day. Whether you like it or not. Then again other sites are for fags, but its not like theres anything wrong with that....

New Jersey Devils: Brodeur is going in a blockbuster deal for Joe Thorton, trust us.

New York Islanders: A hot female reporter that is close to the sitiation, because shes got a hot ass, gets inside stuff for us. Mike Milbury has no penis. Also, he is going to trade a player or two this year.

New York Rangers: Poti, Carter, Dunham, Lindros, Lundmark, Poti again, and Jason Labarbara are all going somewhere. Sather hates these players with a passion. Its well known throughout the league, and on the internet.

Ottawa Senators: Since this team is obviously done, they are gonna start to deal off all major players in a fire sale. All except Karel Rachunek, as they plan to build the entire team aound him, and likely Craig Rivet when they aquire him from the Habs for a 30 goal scorer like Alfredsson or something. THEN, in the major move they will look to land star defenseman Bob Boughner. "Gotta build a team from the defense out", is what a person -who cleans toilets, in what ever the name of Ottawas arena is now called- said.

Philadelphia Flyers: No trades at all. Although Bobby Clarke hasnt returned our phone calls at the time of this article being posted, it is said that Bobby Clarke will never make another deal again, for as long as he is the GM. EVER!

Pittsburgh Penguins: Martin Straka is gonna take a pay cut proving all other asshole sites on the internet WRONG! Straka stays put and LIKES IT!

Tampa Bay Lightning: Of course everyone knows that the Lightning are thinking about trading Khabibulin. All good teams with solid goal tending think about dealing the backbone of their team. Our league official that knows a GM who knows Tampas GM says he isnt sure where he may land.

Toronto Maple Leafs: We dont know shit about Toronto, except that people up there think they know everything. Even though we love everybody, a big fuck you goes out to Toronto and all the other ass clowns in Canada who think the game is all about Canadian heritage, and that we should still be kissing their asses for the sport, even though most of their NHL squads cant hack it in the league. Bitches. We do care though. More on this situation some other day... EVEN THOUGH WE ARE JOKING. SORRY CANADA, Its not my fault you guys cant get over yourselves, and dont have a sense of humor

Washington Capitals: Well as we all know the Caps just want Jagr out of there. Since he IS coming to NY for Anson Carter, they will then also trade Kolzig. Gotta trade the only player on the team who has earned his weight in gold for years. We stole this story from some other site. Screw them we are better than they are. We do share the same source on this one though. If only we had THEIR sources ontop of the star studded ones we already have. We'd dominate the world in ALL news, not just hockey trade rumors like we do now.

More on the West some other day. Stay tuned, Its gonna get crazy one day. Lots of top of the line goalies are gonna be dealt, and a bunch off teams are gonna start dumping salaries. You are really special to us, and we want to be with you for the rest of our lives.

Remember you heard it here first, and...........
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what do you mean Flash Gordon approaching?


Reporter: Ming the Merciless

Too hot to handle

Well, the Rangers have hit a skid, and havent been playing all too well lately. So let the madness begin!!!!!! Of course we have tons of hot HOT HOT rumors to tell you about, because we are the best around.

But first I'd just like to say its a pleasure to join the crew here at Badseedsneewsrumorsandalloutbullshit. Where the real pros work. I love it here, and am thankful for the new fresh opportunity to tell everyone the inside scoop. Working for this site is a pleasure because unlike others, this stuff is all LEGIT. Onto what you wanna read.........

So with Brian Leetch back after being out for 61 years, the Rangers absolutely DO NOT need Tom Poti. "Leetch is so damn amazing that the Rangers really dont need anyone on the blueline" says a person familar with the situation. "Poti isnt Chris Pronger, so he is useless". "Cant wait for Jake Taylor to come in and dominate the league, they say hes good".



Where is Poti going? DUH? Atlanta........... Hello? Its well known that Atlanta has strong interest in Poti, because they .... uhhhh, they need a center. Wait no, they need..... hmmm, yeah they DO need a center. Well Atlanta also has interest in Anson Carter. But as reporter months ago, he is set to go to Washington for Jagr AND hes a winger. Any day now that Jagr deal should happen. Its not like we lie. Come on we have sources.....

So uhhh Poti is definately on the outs. Atlanta is willing to send. ummmmmmm, uhhhhhhhhh, hmmmmmmm, something good for Poti. What they have that is good and in Sathers interest is not exactly known right now but we KNOW Sather is upset with Poti, just like hes upset with Lindros.

In a conversation with our writter Lyle, Sather said "Tom Poti and his 2 year 2.8 million dollar contract can eat my shit, YOU HEAR THAT POTI? EAT MY SHIT! Im tired of his constant overall improvement, and how he leads this team in points for defensemen all the time. Whats he thinking when he shoots the puck? He has no right to join the rush. Thats not his job. Its not like hes Brian Leetch..... Leetch is where its at. His SOLID two way play is whats gonna get this team out of its play-off skid. Leetch is so good, I dont know why I even have other D-men. Poti is as good as gone, and Im gonna trade him to Atlanta. You can print that, and just to let you know you guys at Badseedsnewsrumorsandalloutbullshit are the best in the business. I love you guys".

Well we said we had tons of news, and we do. We just cant tell you it all right now. More in a few days. Stay tuned, stay strong, stay clean, stay hungry, stay positive, stay put, stay away, stablizer bars, Staples center, Steak and potatoes, station wagon. We love you and never want to leave you.


Reported by Lyle, formerly of some weird, gay trade rumor site called The fourth day of her period, or something like that. I cant understand what he says when he speaks, but hes a good guy. They are super gay over there.